The Royal Pains and Treatments of Queen Victoria

In the Victorian Era, periods were known as the “feminine disorder,” a constant sickness for women.  Cramps—“a weakness of the womb”—were thought to leave women physically, mentally, and emotionally inferior to men,  susceptible to disease and prone to fainting spells.  Treatments for severe menstrual cramps ranged from blood letting and leeching to tonics and religious purifications.

Queen Victoria’s options for painkiller were limited to pregnancy and marijuana.  Being royalty, she chose both.
The queen had nine children in all, a high statistic for her era (literally "her" era, the Victorian Era).  She is famous for openly hating babies, pregnant women, and the state of being pregnant. It is speculated that she put up with the discomfort of pregnancy because it temporarily halted her periods, as pregnancy tends to do.  She suffered from painful menstrual cramps, and her symptoms so nearly resemble endometriosis that the diagnosis is now a widely accepted and indisputable fact.  (What I mean to say is that her name and image graces every official “Famous People With Endometriosis” list found on the internet).  
       It is confirmed from her diary records that she lived with abnormally painful menstrual cramps, and it is also confirmed that her husband sought out the best doctors the crown could command to cure the  queen of her "weakness of the womb."  One of these doctors prescribed cannabis to help with both period pain and the discomfort of childbirth.  The queen's monthly drug habit was a widely known fact in the kingdom, which by the end of Queen Victoria was an empire on which “the sun never set.”
Today women with endometriosis and any form of severe menstrual pain have more options—which is both a plus and minus.  My own transgression from pain to painkillers went as follows.

1) Tylenol and two Advil.
2) Probably overdosing on Advil.
3) Low-strength birth control, still lots of Advil.
4) Different birth control, more Advil.
5) Another birth control, upgrade to Naproxen.
6) Birth control attempt #4.  Still Naproxen.  Tylenol in between.
7) Tramadol=controlled substance=awkward conversations with the school nurse
8) Laparoscopic surgery—Endometriosis diagnosis.
9) Tramadol, Anaprox, new birth control.
10) Add some nausea medicine for the new birth control.
11) Ultrasound.  Slightly different birth control.
12) Ladies and gentlemen: another birth control.

The process will continue, a few tweaks with each check up, but curing my pain isn’t going to be a simple process because endometriosis isn’t curable.  Like any disease, endometriosis (and period pain in general) is a constant stressor.  Many endo patients turn to stronger narcotics than Tramadol.  Pain is a gateway drug, and so is endometriosis.  
       Not all of us can afford monthly doses of pot or constant pregnancies.  Those are luxuries  reserved for royalty.  And we can't all be the queen.